Dear lorraine

 
Dear Lorraine,
 
I love my partner, and yet I don’t think we are compatible. We fight all the time, and break up and make up more than you can imagine. I don’t think I can be with him, yet I don’t think I can live without him. HELP!!!
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Hi.

I have been dating for over a year a man I feel is right for me. He likes me and continues to initiate contact and dates and talks about future happenings. All is going well except that there is no intimacy. He says he isn’t ready for a serious relationship and yet he talks about sex all the time. He seems to be interested in me that way he is 10 years younger than me. He also has an ex girlfriend in the picture who he sees, who wants to have their relationship back. When she calls he says he is with a friend. Is there anything I can do to clear this energy? I really like him and want things to stay as they are except with intimacy. That’s what I want and he knows it.

What do you think?

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Dear Lorraine,
 
I really want a long term committed relationship, and I have just met a really nice guy, but I don’t think he is the committing type. He is everything on my list, and every time I mention talking about, ‘us,’ he backs off.
 
What shall I do?
 
Jane
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Dear Lorraine,
 
My ego keeps rearing its ugly head, and I don’t like it. What can I do to stop this from happening?
 
Ego buster
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Dear Lorraine,
 
Where do you and Shawn find the time to take free days and do a monthly date?
 
Tired and Timed out
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Dear Lorraine,
 
I really love my husband but he doesn’t understand me. He doesn’t appreciate the things I do for him and I think that I am always doing most of the work in our relationship. I keep telling him what I need and he doesn’t honour me, but I am always doing everything he asks. I feel like it’s never enough. What do I do?
 
Mary, Ladysmith
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Hi Lorraine,
 
WOW!!  Your book is amazing.  I couldn't put it down. 
 
I am looking for some advice and hope you can help me.
 
I am a divorced mother of 2.  I fell out of love with my husband and left him shortly after my second child was born.  But before my second pregnancy, my sister-in-law was dating someone, (X), that I became attracted to and secretly involved with.  I had never felt the chemistry with anyone that I felt with (X). It was everything about him.  This wave washed over me whenever I saw or talked to him.
 
After I left my husband, (X) stayed with my sister-in-law for various reasons and eventually they split up. In the meantime, I was involved with someone who treated me badly, and I am still not sure why I stayed.  We split up 3 times, and every time I went back thinking that things would get better.  They did for a couple of months, and then the verbal abuse would start all over again.  I finally left the 4th time, and made a promise to myself that I would never have contact with him again. I was unwilling to be manipulated back again.
 
(X) then became involved with someone else, as did I, but I never stopped thinking about him.
 
We told each other that we were "Soul Mates," and when we recently ran into each other again, we realized that the chemistry was stronger than ever.  We have been seeing each other as often as possible for the last few weeks (secretly), as he is still involved in another relationship. We talk about our past and our future.  We are not about to let each other go again.  He has told me that he has never loved anyone the way that he loves me and I have told him the same. He never stopped thinking about me, and I never stopped thinking about him. 
 
I learned from talking to a counsellor that there is a difference in saying those 3 little words.  "I love you." Anyone can say them, but to truly mean them, you must be "In Love" with that person.  Did I understand that correctly?
 
Am I crazy?  Can this really happen?  People getting a second chance with your Soul Mate?  I can't stop thinking about him.  I honestly think there is a higher power that brought us back together.
 
Thank you
 
Kathy
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I don’t think my wife loves me like I love her. I want my wife to feel for me as I feel for her. Is that too much to expect? I feel like she does not respect me or see me for what and who I am. I am not happy. I try to live above the line and I always treat her like I would like to be treated. I am not sure why she really married me but now I am going to horrible places with that thought. HELP!
 
Distressed
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Dear Lorraine,
 
I read your book a few weeks ago now and I’ve got to say, it's got me thinking: about myself and my behaviors, about others that are close to me and about what it means to be in love and to be willing to make love WORK.
 
Now I have to read it again because of the man in (and out of, and in, and out of again) my life who recently took the giant leap (while we are technically NOT seeing each other) of telling me he loved me after letting me know for almost the last two years that he could NEVER commit and would NEVER be capable of love again (after his ex-wife) Anyway, after the book I had one nagging question that I know nobody can answer, but it's still the one question I most want to ask anyone who has taken that leap....How do you decide? How do you know, that this is the one to WORK for, that this is the one to FIGHT for? I don't think you can know for sure can you? I just really wish I did! Because my parents and all of their friends just don't seem that happy. Thanks for the book, thanks for letting me vent a little and thanks for believing in love...It helps!
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So this is the situation. I have been dating Steve for about 7 months. We knew each other for a year before we started dating, and then he finally asked me out. Things were wonderful right from the beginning. The only concern I had was that there was a 12 year age difference, and he had a 13 year old son. So up until now our relationship has been amazing, and then about 2 months ago we stopped having sex, and our relationship just went downhill. He never makes any time for me, but when I ask him if he’s happy he says he is. What on earth do think is happening!? thanx.

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Dear Lorraine

It seems like my partner and I don't have as much in common as we used to and we are heading down two separate paths.We want to stay together but everyday it seems to be more and more difficult. How can we get our relationship back on track?

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