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Men know more about women than women know about men…
One simple statement I shared at a workshop we hosted this past weekend that prompted men in the room to wake up, sit up straight and have a couple of them actually cheer.
Wow…If I had known I would get that kind of reaction to a simple statement like that, I would have certainly used it the Men’s group we spoke at the week before.
But the week before, we had not yet attended the 11th annual Smart Marriages Conference, where we learned that information and much more. The conference was in Denver and hosted by Diane Sollee, the Director of The Coalition for Marriage, Family and Couples Education. It was attended by 200 of the world’s greatest marriage researchers, as well as, well-known authors and speakers. Who were they?
Scott Stanley, John Gray, Katie Hendricks, Harville Hendrix, Tony Robbins, Pat Love, and the list goes on and on…
All of them are brilliant, dedicated human beings, committed to learning, teaching and sharing with others the how’s and why’s of what we are doing to ourselves and each other, all in the name of LOVE.
We were two of 2,500 participants learning everything from the power of the natural chemical oxytocin, to the difference between how boys and girls react to blame and shame.
In all the time that we spent there soaking up all this data, research and tips to stay in the game of love, the biggest lesson we came away with was about men, and we heard it over and over again…Are you ready?
It was quite simply that, men just want to make their women happy!
In a nutshell, that’s it…The tricky part is that women don’t really trust that the man will make them happy. It becomes the woman’s mission to test their spouse to see if they really love them. Big job.
He said he would, but will he really do, ‘Anything,’ for me?
In all my own personal development around relationships, this has been the truth for me. There’s the old line, ‘If you really loved me, you would…’ Would what? Know what you are thinking? Know what you want for dinner? Know that you want a kiss rather than a hug?
Then there’s the come here, go away, game.
Of course I play a mean martyr…a very good one at that.
So how do we win this game of love when all us little girls have grown up with fairy tales and stories of a prince coming to ride off with us into the sunset, and then once the book is closed, and the lights go out, we are reminded of the boogie monster, and to stay away from strangers and don’t trust anyone…stuck between a rock and a hard place, some might say.
Tony Robbins did a fabulous intervention with a couple of therapists. A couple that seemed to be stuck in their relationship. The man had given up standing up for himself, and she was tired of carrying the load, and this had been going on for a long time.
Tony said he had worked with about 3 million people in his almost 30 years of working with others and sees the same thing over and over again. It’s all good and well to work on ourselves, but to do your own work, with your partner, in a structured setting is amazing.
Shawn and I had the opportunity to work through a piece of this magic together and were amazed at the results. It has taken our relationship to another level, and we are looking forward to sharing our knowledge with others.
When we saw Tony Robbins speak on Saturday night, he kept saying, “It’s not about you, it’s about your partner…” My response was ‘WHAT!!!’ Click Here to read Lorraine's article and response!
Has anyone out there struggled from a bit of low self-esteem? Check out this month's Dear Shawn. Click right here!
And how about asking for what you want! My goodness. Dear Lorraine.
When we were in Denver, we hooked up with some folks named Paul and Jennifer Thibeault. They are gurus in The Ultimate Relationships program and for those of you that attended our 1 day workshop this past weekend, you got a glimpse of the work they do. Brilliant. Paul and Jenn walk their talk and are a great addition to the world of Marriage Education. They will do whatever it takes to keep people in the game of love. They're from New Hampshire and will be hosting one of their teleseminars today and we're honoured to be guests on their show. It's at 4pm Pacific and 7pm Eastern. Just click here, and sign up. And it's free. WooooHoooo!!! We want to thank and acknowledge those of you who attended our 1 day workshop this past weekend in Nanaimo, BC. The amount of work done in that room was incredible, and it was inspiring to be with people dedicated to caring for and honouring their relationships the way that you all did. Well done. As Always, Love is the Answer. Lorraine and Shawn |
